


Save Yourself

by spacewitchqueen (vixy)



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Drowning, Ficlet, Gen, POV Quynh | Noriko
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 23:34:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29161992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vixy/pseuds/spacewitchqueen
Summary: She hadn’t dared to hope her family would keep looking for her, they had nothing to guide them to her, they had no way of knowing she was still alive. But now, with this new man with them to tell them about her surely they would. Any day now. Hold on. Wake up. Breathe. Drown. Die. Repeat.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	Save Yourself

She keeps wishing for her suffering to be over. She has known nothing but the burning pain of water invading her lungs for a long time; the maddening helplessness of confinement, and overall, the certainty that no one will ever find her. Loneliness. Unbearable solitude. She both fears and hopes that next time her death will be permanent. 

The only reason her sanity hasn’t fully left her is the memory of her loved ones, she clings to them in the dark, she calls to them with her mind and hopes they are well though she despairs of ever seeing them again. Until one day, in the fleeting moments between regaining consciousness and drowning she sees someone. Not Andromache, not Yusuf, not Nicolò, this is a different kind of dream. Someone new. She fights the pain and tries to hold on for as long as she can before death claims her again and her connection with this man, this new immortal is severed. She would scream if she could. Just as she noticed him, she is sure he noticed her. After centuries, she feels seen again.

A spark of hope blossoms in her chest. She hadn’t dared to hope her family would keep looking for her, they had nothing to guide them to her, they had no way of knowing she was still alive. But now, with this new man with them to tell them about her surely they would. Any day now. Hold on. Wake up. Breathe. Drown. Die. Repeat. 

So she waits. She loses count of the days again. Time doesn’t matter in her watery grave, one minute might very well be one day, one year or five hundred. And then, just as that spark of hope was born it begins to fade away. They’re not coming. Is she crying or is it just the ocean’s salt stinging her face? Letting go of that thread of hope hurts so much more than her unjust punishment. Has her family forgotten her after all? She says her name over and over in her head —the only thing she feels she has left— to remind herself that she’s alive, that she _is_. Quỳnh, Quỳnh, Quỳnh. 

She isn’t sure how much time passes when someone else appears in her dreams. A woman. She doesn’t even try to resist this time, she welcomes the crushing sensation of water. This changes nothing, she knows better than to reawaken her hopes. 

But just as she resigns herself to another brief life, another death, she hears something. Could it be? The ocean roars around her all the time but this is different. Creaking. Rust. Iron finally giving way to the forces of nature. She hits the walls of her prison to make sure and the ominous grating sound is louder. She dies a few more times before she can actually get out, but it doesn’t matter. She’s laughing even as she drowns again. At last, she is free. And she knows just what she wants to do.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading <3 I hope you liked it


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